Posts in Category: Human Interest

Forsaken – Introducing Dody

Death & Dying During COVID

Hold my hand, she said, her eyes pleading with mine. Please, she repeated, hold my hand when I go. I do not want to die alone.

Nearly ten years ago, I kept my promise and held my mother’s hand tightly as she passed from this world into the next. Five hours later, I did the same for my father. Witnesses were present. A hospice nurse and a few friends and family showered my folks with love and compassion during their last hours. They were not alone.

Afterward, more friends and family arrived. They brought food, embraced me, and helped me to get to the next step. There was a funeral, and more people came. Ken, a childhood neighbor, led the service, weaving in humorous and heartfelt tales about my parents. There was a lot of laughter, some tears, and immeasurable love in the room. I was not alone.

Alone.

The word echoes in my mind as I write. I pause and feel its gravity. When my parents died, they and I were surrounded, enfolded, and lifted in love. And still, I felt alone.

Imagine the countless number of people who died alone in hospitals and long term care facilities this year due to safety precautions related to COVID-19. While healthcare workers have done their best to fill the gap, it is not the same. How many people were denied the ability to keep their promise to hold their beloveds’ hands as they left this world?

Consider the unbearable grief of the forsaken. They waited from a distance as their loved ones passed. And, afterward, they were unable to gather to support one another or attend funerals or memorials. Those left behind have suffered in isolation. They are, indeed, alone.

Dody, a hospice bereavement counselor, volunteered to share her thoughts and experience related to death, dying, and serving those left behind during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Dody first speaks about the five steps of grief, as defined by psychiatrist Elisabeth Kubler Ross. They are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Each stage of grief must be experienced for closure to occur. The steps are not static and can be experienced multiple times before acceptance occurs.

Dody points out that during the COVID-19, pandemic grief has been further complicated as both the dying and survivor experience feelings of abandonment. In Florida, where Dody resides, visitation to patients in hospitals and nursing homes has been severely restricted or disallowed since March.

Funerals, memorial services, and celebrations of life are the first step toward healing. Dody explains these events are severely delayed or not happening. There are several reasons. Government restrictions currently disallow funeral homes from conducting services, and crematoriums have a large backlog. Additionally, family and friends’ are often unable to gather due to travel restrictions and quarantine protocols.

As a result, the survivor’s grief is greater than anything Dody has seen in all her years as a bereavement counselor. Never have the bereaved felt so isolated.

Dody believes her role as a bereavement counselor is to be a supportive presence for her clients. She helps the bereaved accept the reality of loss with tools designed to assess clients’ most urgent needs. Each client is encouraged to keep a journal. Additionally, Dody listens. Most of Dody’s counseling sessions are currently held online via Zoom.

Dody feels that it is an essential part of the healing process to maintain a bond with the deceased. She encourages anyone who has lost a loved one to continue to celebrate holiday traditions, make a dish or meal that your loved one enjoyed preparing, or anything else that might sustain the bond.

Dody’s beloved father died three years ago this month. Among Dody’s most cherished memories of her father is that he was always singing and dancing. Music is healing for Dody. Dancing in the Sky, by Dani and Lizzy, is a song that brings her comfort and keeps her father alive in her heart.

Thank you, Dody, for participating in A Time to Heal!

For your work with hospice, I applaud you. It cannot be easy, and I suspect there are days that the emotional burden becomes unbearable. Yet, you continue. The gift you give to those in your care is immeasurable. In this blog post, you have given voice to those grieving in isolation. I hope and pray that in some small way, they feel heard and lifted.

Follow the link to Listen to Dancing In Heaven By Dani and Lizzie https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UR4T0av0o40

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A Time To Heal is a project that promotes peaceful and constructive conversations related to difficult topics. Topics are related to the events of 2020. They include but are not limited to Covid-19, Essential Workers, Race, Racism, the LGBTQIA community about the recent supreme court ruling, and more.

Please Note: The purpose of the A Time To Heal is to create a safe space to allow others to express their feelings and opinions. The opinions of those interviewed may not be the same as my own or the reader. If you choose to comment on a post, please do so respectfully.

A Time To Heal, the Exhibit will be on display at City Center Arts in Muskegon, beginning September 3, 2020, to October 10, 2020. Please check the website before attending to verify hours of operation. http://citycenterarts.com/

Gail is the owner of Lakehouse Photo LLC and The Gratitude Project By Lakehouse Photo LLC. Learn more about Gail, The Gratitude Project, and her photography at the sites listed below. Additionally, Gail’s photography can be purchased from Lakehousephoto.com, City Center Arts in Muskegon, http://citycenterarts.com/, NCCA-Artplace in Fremont, http://www.ncca-artsplace.org/ or directly from the artist. 

Photography Website: https://www.lakehousephoto.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livingatlakehouse/

The Gratitude Project: http://gratitudebylakehouse.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gratitude_by_lakehouse_photo/

2020© Gail Howarth, Living At The Lakehouse, and Lakehouse Photo. Unauthorized use or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author or owner is strictly prohibited. 

Witness – Introducing Jill

COVID-19! Just say or see the word, and an avalanche of thoughts, images, and emotions come to mind. It has changed the way we do and think about almost everything. Yet, most of us have not experienced the virus first hand. It makes it difficult to understand why such drastic measures have been taken to prevent its spread. More than 6,000,000 people in the United States have had coronavirus. Fewer than half have fully recovered, and 192,000 people have died. Despite the numbers, some question whether it is a hoax, a liberal plot, or a media event.

Jill is a survivor of COVID-19 and has witnessed the reality of the virus both personally and professionally. Jill is the Executive Director of Pioneer Resources, Inc., in Muskegon, Michigan. The organization provides a multitude of services, including low-cost housing to Seniors and people with disabilities.

On March 22, 2020, Governor Gretchen Whitmer issued a shelter in place order for the State of Michigan. Chaos erupted. Panic buying at grocery stores left shelves empty as people prepared for the unknown. Non-essential employees were furloughed or began to work from home. Students shifted quickly to online learning. And, organizations like Pioneer Resources were trying to determine how to move forward safely.

Jill and the management team at Pioneer Resources quickly learned and responded as new information regarding COVID-19 became available. Protecting staff and residents became their highest priority. PPE’s were in short supply and difficult to obtain. Jill worked quickly to locate new sources that could meet supply needs. Luke Aurner, Regional Healthcare Coalition Coordinator of the Muskegon Health Department, and a few other organizations around the state that Jill is in membership with coordinated and provided the necessary PPE so that the staff of Pioneer Resources could continue to provide services and remain safe.

Despite their best efforts, beginning in early April, the housing units were hit hard with the virus. Both residents and staff tested positive for COVID-19. Symptoms ran the gamut from mild to severe. One resident was in the hospital in rehab for over two months, and unfortunately, the virus even took lives.

During the early stages of the pandemic, the protocol was to separate those that displayed symptoms from the general population. Sadly, by the time an individual’s symptoms appeared, the virus had already spread to others.

During the same time, a resident attempted to get tested due to a high fever but was denied testing and sent home. Under a recent order of The Michigan Department of Health and Human Services, anyone living in a congregate setting was to be prioritized for testing. However, the order escaped the notice of the testing center. Policies were changing quickly, and it was difficult for healthcare providers to keep up with the onslaught of new information. A shortage of COVID-19 test kits in Muskegon County compounded the issue and made it impossible to provide tests to everyone that wanted or needed one.

The following day the resident’s fever had worsened. There was no question that the resident needed to be tested and treated for his illness. However, Jill feared that the testing site would turn the resident away for a second time. Jill contacted one of the hospital directors to voice her concerns and provide him with the information related to the new policy. Jill’s advocacy opened the door to testing not only for the Pioneer Resources resident but for all others living in a congregate setting that utilized the testing site.

On April 11, 2020, dressed in full PPE except for goggles, Jill accompanied the resident to the hospital to ensure that testing was completed. He was tested and, as suspected, he was positive for COVID-19. On April 17, 2020, pale, coughing, and barely audible, Jill read the scripture from her devotional live on Facebook as she had done so many other mornings. After reading the verse, she briefly shared that she had tested positive for the virus. Then, despite her weakened state, she turned her focus back to God and completed reading her devotional.

Jill’s faith sustains her, and she feels guided by God’s presence in every moment. She thinks that there is a reason for all things that happen to us—in her case, even getting COVID-19.

Jill describes COVID as a nasty, nasty virus and that she would not wish it upon her worst enemy. It felt unending and was worse than pneumonia or bronchitis. Jill’s fever lasted ten days, and she describes the chills that accompanied it as tooth chattering. Her cough was painful, and her constant companion. Jill did not require hospitalization but monitored her oxygen and used an inhaler to decrease coughing and increase breathing. After two weeks, she experienced a depression that left her crying and wondering if it would ever end. At three weeks, Jill was able to leave the house but still suffered from a cough, fatigue, and shortness of breath. Months later, the symptoms persist.

Jill worked from home throughout her illness. She felt as the leader of an agency in crisis, she felt as though it was the right thing to do. Working helped her to focus on matters outside her own suffering.

Jill’s husband also contracted the illness. Jill often feels guilty for unwittingly bringing the virus home. He suffered as much as she did with the added strain of having difficulty getting clearance to return to work. But as Jill looks back, she believes she would have done everything the same way. Serving God and her community is who Jill is, not what she does. Turning away is not an option.

Some of the benefits she has seen as a result of the pandemic include people gardening, families experiencing quality time together, and learning that we can work effectively remotely. Jill notes that we are learning to connect in new and old ways. In Jill’s case, friends and neighbors did what they could to help her and her husband during their illness. Daily, people brought groceries, meals, and cards.

As an agency, she feels that the pandemic forced them to update and create better systems. Improvements include everything from enhanced digital records to a concrete and realistic emergency protocol that will benefit all those that work for and utilize services provided by Pioneer Resources. Lastly, it made her increasingly aware and grateful for a fantastic management team.

Jill does not believe that herd immunity is the answer. Jill worries about the children and grandparents. She encourages everyone to be cautious and stay safe until we can begin immunization. What that looks like for individuals and families might be different. It might be staying home and not wearing a mask. Or, it could be being out in public while wearing a mask. She admits, masks are not comfortable, but that we will adjust. She compares it to seatbelts and other safety devices. We don’t like the change, but we adjust.

Jill, it is with sincere thanks that I close this post. Your passion for serving those in need is nothing less than inspirational. Even if you never spoke of God or Jesus, your faith is transparent in the way you conduct your life. Your willingness to share your COVID-19 journey places a real person behind the illness. Hopefully, people will go forward with greater awareness, compassion, and empathy for others.

More information about Pioneer Resources

Pioneer Resources provides a blend of services to seniors and people with disabilities based upon need. Services include housing that ranges from independent living to 24-hour care, job training, and placement, a camp that serves both day and overnight guests, and an ABA program for children diagnosed with autism. They also provide senior activities and teach general living skills.

Pioneer Resources has served Muskegon County for over 65 years. Last year 3500 people received assistance and over one million miles of transportation given. Most of the funding used to provide services comes from Medicaid. However, they offer far more than medical services to the community. Like so many helping organizations, they have lost much funding this year. Please consider a donation today.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/pioneer-resources?pc=fb_co_campmgmt_w&rcid=r01-158522512145-00c99b7c2e0e45ba&utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=p_lico%2Bshare-sheet&fbclid=IwAR3ZgiBv7YkFYvb6RLhdC-UODHPRcJxQPxW1tonpKue2ZGSItid9k8fVUaM

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A Time To Heal is a project that promotes peaceful and constructive conversations related to difficult topics. Topics are related to the events of 2020. They include but are not limited to Covid-19, Essential Workers, Race, Racism, the LGBTQIA community about the recent supreme court ruling, and more.

Please Note: The purpose of the A Time To Heal is to create a safe space to allow others to express their feelings and opinions. The opinions of those interviewed may not be the same as my own or the reader. If you choose to comment on a post, please do so respectfully.

A Time To Heal, the Exhibit will be on display at City Center Arts in Muskegon, beginning September 2, 2020, to October 10, 2020. Please check the website before attending to verify hours of operation. http://citycenterarts.com/

Gail is the owner of Lakehouse Photo LLC and The Gratitude Project By Lakehouse Photo LLC. Learn more about Gail, The Gratitude Project, and her photography at the sites listed below. Purchase Gail’s photography a Lakehousephoto.com, City Center Arts in Muskegon, http://citycenterarts.com/, NCCA-Artplace in Fremont, http://www.ncca-artsplace.org/ or directly from the artist. 

Photography Website: https://www.lakehousephoto.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livingatlakehouse/

The Gratitude Project: http://gratitudebylakehouse.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gratitude_by_lakehouse_photo/

2020© Gail Howarth, Living At The Lakehouse, and Lakehouse Photo. Unauthorized use or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author or owner is strictly prohibited. 

Happy Together – Introducing Meg & Kris

Marriage!

The word conjures a multitude of images and emotions. Some, based upon reality, yet many are deeply rooted in the happily ever after genre of literature, television, and movies. The first picture that pops into my mind is the wedding cake topper. You know the one, the one with the handsome white groom and the beautiful white bride.  Whether this is your vision or not, what happens when reality and fantasy do not match?

Meet, Meg and Kris.

Meg and Kris have been happily married for nine years. They have a lovely home, great jobs, two exceptionally bright kids, two cats, and a dog. They are a beautiful family! Yet, many have found their union disturbing.

Meg was repeatedly warned by well-meaning friends and family not to marry Kris. Even the church stated that they would not “waste” a priest on their wedding. Why such opposition? Kris was from a different culture and might become abusive, he was Mormon, and he was too brown. Kris is Indian.

Kris, too, was questioned about his choice of bride. The Indian side of the family wondered why he was not marrying an Indian girl. And, his mother was upset because he chose a non-Mormon.

Meg and Kris experience discrimination fairly often. To some, the level of bias in certain situations may seem minor. But, minor or major, it all adds up. It is, at times, tedious for the couple. Strangers ask Meg where her kids are from and tell her they look exotic. Car door locks click as they walk through their mostly-white neighborhood where they have lived for years, and often people change seats at theatres and events when they notice that the man sitting behind them is brown.

Though Kris has experienced the pain of racism personally, he shares his own cultural bias. Kris grew up with an Indian Father and White Cuban mother. Kris’s father worked internationally, and they traveled extensively throughout the world. They lived in India for 11 years, Indonesia for 5, and Korea for 2. Kris attended English speaking schools when he lived in India. The teachers were strict and used corporal punishment to manage the classroom. Kris learned quickly that he and his sister were spared from the indignity because their mother was white. Kris admits that being bi-racial made him feel like he was better than the kids that were 100% Indian.

Imagine Kris’s surprise when at 34, he took a DNA test that revealed that he was 100% Indian. His parents had kept his adoption secret since birth. The discovery has turned his world upside down and left him, asking himself tough questions about who he is versus who he thinks he is.

I asked Kris and Meg some tough questions about racism, concerns, healing, and how healing would occur.

Racism. What is it about, and why can’t we get over it?

Kris believes that people fear that sharing power means losing power. But there is no loss in extending equal rights to all.

Can we fix it, if so, how?

Both Kris and Meg are hopeful.

Kris believes that social media will help increase awareness and aid in resolving issues, even though it is used by others to promote opposing views and agendas. He states that a book can be burned, and it will be gone. But, what is put on the internet cannot be erased. Many people have joined to fight for what we believe in. Hopefully, we can keep up the momentum. We cannot allow it to be covered up again.

Meg believes that children should be introduced to diversity at a very early age. She feels it is essential to focus not only on our differences but also our similarities. Meg reflects upon her own childhood and the values her parents instilled upon her. Meg’s mother was a child of the ’60s and was significantly impacted by the civil rights movement. When she purchased dolls for her children, she made sure that there was also a black doll for each white doll. Additionally, her mother delighted in introducing other cultures to them. Meg’s mom worked in a water testing lab where the scientist and chemists came from all over the world. The children were able to learn about them through visits, the sharing of stories, and food. They frequently festivals that celebrated different ethnicities. There was never a stigma attached to persons from another culture. In fact, quite the opposite. There was a sense of fascination, wonder, and appreciation for the differences.

Both of her parents encouraged her to respect all persons, no matter their status in life. Her father believed that when it comes down to it, we are really all the same.

Concerns?

Kris is not looking forward to the day he has to have a discussion with his son about how the world will see him differently based on the color of his skin.

Meg fears her children will be treated differently or bullied in school.

Final Thoughts

Meg and Kris entered into a marriage, knowing that not everyone was in favor of the union. But, they knew the depth of their love and that they were willing to do the work to live and love one day at a time for the rest of their lives. They knew their journey would be filled with love, joy, friendship, adventure, and passion. They also knew that they would face many challenges and that one of those would be related to the difference in their skin color. They did not care. They did it anyway.

Many thanks to Meg and Kris for participating in A Time To Heal. May the rest of your days be filled with happiness and joy.

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A Time To Heal is a project that promotes peaceful and constructive conversations related to difficult topics. Topics are related to the events of 2020. They include but are not limited to Covid-19, Essential Workers, Race, Racism, the LGBTQIA community about the recent supreme court ruling, and more.

Please Note: The purpose of the A Time To Heal is to create a safe space to allow others to express their feelings and opinions. The opinions of those interviewed may not be the same as my own or the reader. If you choose to comment on a post, please do so respectfully.

A Time To Heal, the Exhibit will be on display at City Center Arts in Muskegon, beginning September 2, 2020, to October 10, 2020. Please check the website before attending to verify hours of operation. http://citycenterarts.com/

Gail is the owner of Lakehouse Photo LLC and The Gratitude Project By Lakehouse Photo LLC. Learn more about Gail, The Gratitude Project, and her photography at the sites listed below. Additionally, Gail’s photography can be purchased from Lakehousephoto.com, City Center Arts in Muskegon, http://citycenterarts.com/, NCCA-Artplace in Fremont, http://www.ncca-artsplace.org/ or directly from the artist. 

Photography Website: https://www.lakehousephoto.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livingatlakehouse/

The Gratitude Project: http://gratitudebylakehouse.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gratitude_by_lakehouse_photo/

2020© Gail Howarth, Living At The Lakehouse, and Lakehouse Photo. Unauthorized use or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author or owner is strictly prohibited. 

The Whole World – Introducing Pastor Sarah

A little over a year ago, my partner and I stumbled upon a wedding that was about to begin on the shore of Lake Michigan at Little Sable Point Lighthouse. The wedding coordinator was making sure everything and everyone was in place. The pre-wedding music was fun, and many of the wedding guests and beachgoers ran joyfully through the sand. The atmosphere was magical! With a wink and nod to one another, my partner and I chose to stay for the service.

It was one of the best weddings I have ever attended. I was moved to the point of tears several times during the ceremony. The officiant was a middle-aged woman dressed in a white robe. She was as radiant as the bride, and it was clear that the joining of the young man and woman as husband and wife brought her great joy.

As the pastor began to speak, she pointed to the Lighthouse and reminded us of Matthew 5:14-16
“You are the Light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your Light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.”

She then told the couple that each of them is a Light and that their union would create a brighter Light, and with the support of family, even more brilliant. And, lastly, with the help of the church, they would become no less than a beacon of Light. Pastor Sarah followed up by singing This Little Light of Mine.

At that moment, I knew that the pastor was an extraordinary person and that I needed to find out where she served. My search led me to Trinity Lutheran Church in New Era. The unexpected joy of a spontaneous trip to the beach, and the decision to crash a wedding have changed my life significantly. It ended a 15-year hiatus from church, healed a tremendous amount of church hurt, and led to a great friendship with the woman I now know as Pastor Sarah.

Pastor Sarah was born in Grand Rapids, Michigan, in 1961, during immense social upheaval. Her father, a Lutheran Pastor, was active in the Civil Rights Movement. Her family commonly discussed issues related to race, equality, and human rights around the dinner table. Sarah began attending marches, peaceful protests, and rallies with her father by the time she was five years old.

In the spring of 1967, Pastor Sarah, at the age of 6, had an experience that she feels solidified her commitment to work toward equality and to end racism. She was leaving school, and the safety guard shouted in agitation, “They are coming, they are coming.” She asked: “Who is coming.” The boy replied: “The niggers are coming, the niggers.” Sarah knew this was not a word that should be used and sensed that there was big trouble to come.

Trouble did come. The decision to bus black students to achieve racial balance within communities was met with resistance and anger. Unrest continued, and by mid-summer, the issues of civil rights had become so heated that riots occurred. And, at school that fall, young Sarah watched as black students were beaten and bullied. Sarah was outspoken and fought hard to make a stand against the abuse and discrimination of her classmates. For this, she was often ostracized by her peers and had few friends. Eventually, many of Sarah’s classmates did support her efforts, but it took several years.

Sarah’s interest in ending racism continued. In high school, she sought out classes taught by the one and only black teacher. She learned much from him and her black classmates. As time passed, it became clear that one day she would go to the seminary and then serve as a pastor with a focus on social justice.

Pastor Sarah continued to immerse herself in black culture after high school. She moved to Oakland, California, where she lived in a black community for several years. It was during her time in Oakland that Pastor Sarah states that she gained a very brief glimpse at what it feels like to be a minority or “the other.” She admits that there is still no way for a white woman to know what it is to be black in America.

Pastor Sarah received her undergraduate degree from Michigan State University, where she studied English, Political Science, and Religion. While there, she sought out black mentors and advisors to help her understand issues of race more deeply. Additionally, Pastor Sarah received her Master of Theology Degree from Lutheran School of Theology at Chicago.

Upon receiving her Master’s degree, Pastor Sarah fully believed she would work in an urban community. That expectation was not met. As it turns out, Reverend Sarah Samuelson served in small farm communities in West Michigan until finding her permanent home at Trinity Lutheran Church of New Era. Regardless of city or country, Pastor Sarah remains a passionate voice for equality. Her sermons are filled with compassion, understanding, and encouragement to put aside personal bias, judgment, and prejudice, and to love one another as Jesus demonstrated.

I asked Pastor Sarah about her role as a pastor, racism, and healing. Here is a bit of what she said.

Role As A Pastor
Pastor Sarah feels she is to love her parishioners right where they are, no matter what they believe. Then, to gently guide them to live more Christlike.

On Racism
Loss is the fear that fuels racism. Power can be lost. But the loss of special status, and our history, and the way we define ourselves may be more significant. Pastor Sarah shares two stories to clarify her thoughts. First, as a child, her mother often told her that they were proud Swedes and special to be a Swede. In second grade, the teacher asked that each student stand and share their nationality with the others. Sarah could barely wait for her turn and shook with anticipation. She knew that upon sharing, the others would see that she was incredibly special due to her heritage. When it was her turn, she shouted, “I am a Swede.” No one reacted. Sarah was confused. Did they not know she was special? Or, could her mother have lied to her? At that moment, she lost her story, her history, her special status.

Second, Pastor Sarah points to the cemetery next to the church. The cemetery is a part of the story and identity of Trinity Lutheran. Twenty-two families started this church. Those buried in the cemetery are often mentioned as the saints on the hill from which we came. It is a unique and marvelous story. But it is not the end of the story. The congregation has grown beyond the original 22 families, and everyone is welcome to attend. The story is the beginning, but it is not the end.
Today she knows that we all long to feel special, but that God loves us all the same.

On Healing
Where are we going, Pastor Sarah asks? We are going to the same place where we will all be together. We can look backward or forward. Looking forward, we need to get over our issues of race. How? By imitating the Kingdom of God here on Earth.

Pastor Sarah, you are a Light. I have heard you quote not only the Bible but also bits of poetry here and there. I will end this post with wise words from Leonard Cohen. “There is a crack in everything. That’s how the Light gets in.” Thank you for lovingly helping us find and heal our cracks.

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A Time To Heal is a project that promotes peaceful and constructive conversations related to difficult topics. Topics are related to the events of 2020. They include but are not limited to Covid-19, Essential Workers, Race, Racism, the LGBTQIA community about the recent supreme court ruling, and more.

Please Note: The purpose of the A Time To Heal is to create a safe space to allow others to express their feelings and opinions. The opinions of those interviewed may not be the same as my own or the reader. If you choose to comment on a post, please do so respectfully.

A Time To Heal, the Exhibit will be on display at City Center Arts in Muskegon beginning September 1, 2020. Please check the website before attending to verify hours of operation. http://citycenterarts.com/

Gail is the owner of Lakehouse Photo LLC and The Gratitude Project By Lakehouse Photo LLC. Learn more about Gail, The Gratitude Project, and her photography at the sites listed below. Additionally, Gail’s photography can be purchased from Lakehousephoto.com, City Center Arts in Muskegon, http://citycenterarts.com/, NCCA-Artplace in Fremont, http://www.ncca-artsplace.org/ or directly from the artist. 

Photography Website: https://www.lakehousephoto.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livingatlakehouse/

The Gratitude Project: http://gratitudebylakehouse.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gratitude_by_lakehouse_photo/

2020© Gail Howarth, Living At The Lakehouse, and Lakehouse Photo. Unauthorized use or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author or owner is strictly prohibited. 

Introducing Chauncey – Pomp & Circumstance

Chauncey has a dream. It is the first day of his final year in high school. He is filled with anticipation and can bearly wait to begin the last chapter of his high school career. But when he arrives, the halls are empty. There is no one there. His footsteps echo loudly and long, and his breath is magnified. He begins to panic. Where are all the people? He peers into a multitude of classrooms attempting to understand the absence of his classmates and teachers. But nothing makes sense. And, then, he wakes.

Chauncey and I met for the first time shortly before the Covid-19 Pandemic. When I asked him if he would consider being a part of A Time To Heal, he quickly accepted. A few days later, on one of the hottest days of summer, we connected at his high school for a candid conversation. Chauncey shared his thoughts and feelings about his sudden departure from school, living in quarantine, and the cancellation of so many events that mark the rite of passage of a graduating senior.

Chauncey is a smart kid, enjoys a challenge, and can figure out most things quickly and independently. Therefore, City High Middle School was the perfect fit for him. The school participates in the IB or International Baccalaureate program. Students must complete all high school classes by the end of tenth grade. The remaining years are dedicated to long term collaborative projects, a secondary language, and coursework related to the theory of knowledge. The program sets a very high standard of excellence and encourages students to believe that the sky is the limit. In addition to his demanding coursework, Chauncey was active in theatre and a member of the Ottawa Hills Swim and Dive Team.

Chauncey is an extrovert in every sense of the word. He is outgoing, likable, and energized by being around others. To be quarantined or “trapped” with his family was not good for him. He was initially angry and responded with self-destructive behavior such as playing online games for hours and hours or just doing nothing. As time passed, his anger subsided, along with the rest of his emotions. Chauncy shut down and was unable to find the motivation to complete the simplest tasks. He even missed critical deadlines related to his college enrollment.

After a few months, Chauncey realized that something needed to change. A friend suggested that he might feel better if he began working out daily. Luckily, it worked! The daily routine gave him something to look forward to, a sense of purpose, and a routine. He began to engage more with others playing online games, youth group zoom meetings, and talking with members of his swing dance group. Just days before we met, he and a few members of the dance group met at a park to visit and dance. The experience lifted his heart and brought him great joy. It was his first outing in over four months. Chauncey and his friends, buoyed by the experience, made plans to meet again. Unfortunately, the number of Covid-19 cases began to escalate, and the group decided to cancel their next get-together.

Chauncey was robbed. The pandemic stole from him his final months with teachers, friends, and classmates. Class trips, senior skip day, prom, his graduation ceremony, parties, and other events appeared on his calendar but never happened. Though Chauncey received his degrees, there was no Pomp and Circumstance. No celebration.

Chauncey’s biggest disappointment, however, was that he was not able to write the exams that would have given him a shot at earning his International Baccalaureate Degree. The certification is accepted by many colleges and can launch a first-year college student to Sophomore status. Chauncey had looked forward to the sense of accomplishment he would have felt, degree or not, by completing the intensive exam process. After sharing this with me, Chauncey shrugged his shoulders, looked away, and stayed in a far distant place for a moment. When he snapped out of it, he attempted to make light the situation. Giving me a big Chauncey grin, he said: “It’s a really ugly piece of paper like card stock, and it has a funny looking sticker on the bottom. Who needs that? I still graduated from City High Middle, and it is a tough school. I can be proud of that.”

Chauncey is very excited about attending Grand Rapids Community College this fall. However, he is not looking forward to sitting through courses that are near identical to the advanced classes he took in high school. As mentioned above, Chauncey was denied the ability to complete the exams that would have earned him an IB degree. No exams mean no test scores. And, without test scores or the IB degree, college credits can not be given.

After he receives his associate’s degree from GRCC, Chauncey hopes to transfer to Western Michigan University to study theatre. Chauncey admits that the theatre is not the typical career choice for students graduating from a school with a robust academic track. However, music and theatre are his greatest passion. Chauncey envisions himself one day performing on Broadway. 

Chauncey’s backup plan? He will become a lawyer. The transition seems logical. Both require communication skills, the ability to be quick on your feet, and a bit of acting.

Chauncey, no matter what you do or become, you will do it in your style, with ambition, intelligence, and humor. It was an honor and privilege to hear and share your story. Congratulations Chauncey! Your high school graduation is just the beginning. “Oh, the places you will go!”

Pomp & Circumstance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CASX-05ihfg

Footnote:
“Oh, the places you will go!” Dr. Seuss.


A Time To Heal is a project that promotes peaceful and constructive conversations related to difficult topics. Topics are related to the events of 2020. They include but are not limited to Covid-19, Essential Workers, Race, Racism, the LGBTQIA community as it relates to the recent supreme court ruling, and more.

Are you interested in participating? Message me.

A Time To Heal, the Exhibit will be on display during September. Please check their website before attending to verify hours of operation. http://citycenterarts.com/

Gail is the owner of Lakehouse Photo LLC and The Gratitude Project By Lakehouse Photo LLC. Learn more about Gail, The Gratitude Project, and her photography at the sites listed below. Additionally, Gail’s photography can be purchased from Lakehousephoto.com, City Center Arts in Muskegon, http://citycenterarts.com/, NCCA-Artplace in Fremont, http://www.ncca-artsplace.org/ or directly from the artist. 

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